Dear Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim,

Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim cover art © Bethesda (source)

Hello Skyrim, it’s me. You might remember me as my character, the brazen Imperial warrior Kallan. Yeah, it’s been quite awhile since we’ve seen each other.  I’ve been…busy, and…I’ve been meaning to—what?

Oh yes, I know where you are.  You’re on “the shelf,” and I see you’ve been pushed over to the far right side to make room for other games, played and unplayed.  There’s a lot of—huh?

Well, thanks…I…I miss you too.  The questing, the hoarding of (useless) stuff, the alchemy, the inns, the bears, and those silly dragons.  We did have some good times didn’t we?

I rented you in January and we connected. I crafted my character with care knowing we’d be spending a lot of time with each other. After some initial small talk and a tutorial, I made the first bold move. Despite my rattling nerves, my heart and soul were ready.  Soon enough, the enjoyment of your company knew no bounds, just like the boundless world of Skyrim itself!  I know my love grew a little cold during the lazy end of winter, and I vented…but I needed to.   I just needed some time away…a break…we were on a break, right?

And after I had some time to clear my head, I returned, renewed, and that well of passion for you filled like never before.  And after one particularly heady evening in late March, I committed.  I was so ready to, I had convinced myself of that.  I was ready to command and conquer your lands.  I was ready again for the heat, the sweat, the excitment, the lust, the anticipation, and the…the…victory!

And we quested…together…you and I.  And it was magnificent.

As I sit here and remember our times together, my heart beats a little quicker and flashes of excitement make my hands quiver, but we both know what’s going on here.  It’s now August, it’s been at least 3, maybe 3 ½ months since we’ve really spent any time together.  And some of that’s my fault, but I’m not the only one to blame.

But…you aren’t to shoulder the rest of the blame.  I mean, what about the hype?  The sheer amount of publicity that preceded your release, it was huge, mind-blowing, almost ridiculous!  It was everywhere – TV, magazines, the internet.  And I fell for a lot of it – the praise, the sense of joy, the all-encompassing story – that’s what I thought I’d get, even though I had never played an Elder Scrolls game before.  I was…naïve…in your ways; an eager nubile in search of an experienced master.  And I didn’t take the plunge lightly.  It was months after your release before I developed enough courage to approach you.  And since I didn’t have a lot of practice, I thought renting was a good idea.  I had gone that route before with success, and I’m sure you were as curious and cautious as I.

Though my interest in you waxed and waned over the months of trial and ownership, I did manage to make it to, well…um…Level 11. But I got into the high double-digits with two-handed combat and light armor, and I was getting pretty good at lockpicking.  And I was just starting to develop my magic capabilities.  I killed three dragons during that time, and I didn’t think I’d see any until much later in the game.  Yet I know a mere and pitiful Level  11 was not what you were expecting of me – I told you of the hours, nay the weeks, I sunk into Fable and Dragon Age.  I know you thought you’d get a good 60-80 hours of game play out of me easily.  And I swear, that’s what I thought too!  There was never a doubt in my mind that you would do anything less than consume me with an all-knowing fervor!

I’m not sure exactly when my fire for you was expelled. Around the time of E3, maybe?  I was so super busy, what with the wedding and vacation and all.  I didn’t really have much time to play anything in May or June, let alone sink some time into questing.  The thing is…and…I…oh man (sigh).  Okay…deep breath… … The thing is, sometimes — to be downright honest, sometimes your quests weren’t that much fun.  Too much traveling, too much repetition, and not enough direction.  I got…well…I got bored, and frustrated.  I’m sorry to tell it to you like this – I not trying to be mean.  You were never mean to me.  You were sweet and gentle, and you could never change – you’re not programmed to do so.  But I needed to move on.  I’ve gotta take time to explore other games.  For me…for us.

I hope you understand.

I can’t and don’t expect us to be friends at this point.  Perhaps someday we’ll nod and smile as we pass each other in the den, but for now, we should probably…cut the cord.  God, it hurts, but it’s the only way!  And look, it’s not like you’re being disposed of – you are a part of our game library, you are a part of this house, and we’ll give you all the respect you deserve. And who knows?  Someday, I might visit again, when that questing bug strikes.  And then—hmm?  No!  No, I’m not using you just for your quests.  Well, I am using you, but you’re using me just as much.  I need to play games as much as you need to be played.  It’s a thing like that, y’know?

I think I’ve rambling on for long enough here – you’re tired, I can see that.  And so am I.  We both need some rest…okay haha.  Yes, you’ve been resting.  I deserve that. Let’s both remember the good times; maybe we’ll have them again someday.

With sincerity and  hope,


  1. Ha ha, I understand very well the relationship between game and gamer. I still must have a talk with a few of my own games. They’re likely getting suspicious by now. They keep asking why they’re stuck in this odd pile away from everyone else. I just can’t tell them that it means they’re likely to go on sale on Amazon soon.
    I think my current game is feeling a bit offended, as well. I stopped playing early today, because I’m just not in a gaming mood after yesterday.


    • I have several other games that won’t talk to me. I recently rekindled my relationship with Arkham City, but it was hard for me to take the first step towards reconciliation. I think we’re back on good terms now.

      I hope your gaming mood comes back soon, but it’s understandable why it’s gone. Take time and be well.


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